Posts Tagged With: Jed

kitchen porn is what keeps me sane.

Jed has left.
Actually he has left about 6 days ago.
The first thing I did after I waved him goodbye was to go to the nearest kitchen appliance shop and look at all of the things I couldn’t afford.

I want to buy a kitchen aid.
This ‘wanting’ may include a grand total of  no less than 5 kitchen aid mixers.
Yes, that is right. Five.
One was never going to be enough.
I could use them in my budding currently non-existent cupcake/food company I told myself. Clearly if I was going to do that then I needed more than one.
The problem was the fantastical range of colours .
Black was an obvious choice.
It’s the colour I wear the most.

I have decided on the GLASS bowl with this one.
It’s my staple colour.
I like black.

Obviously I am having more than one.
Cream or white?
Both are colours that I wear often and that I like.

OR

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then I saw this most gorgeous light pistachio green.
It was a suave italian.
“Hello La mia stella brillante! lo scoperò fuori dai vostri piedi~*”
Yes.
Yes.

That brings me up to a total of four.
I detest the number four.
I loathe it.
I prefer using the term ‘3b’ as a replacement.
The number four is too perfect.
Too symmetrical.
It’s fake.
The plastic blonde bimbo that is ‘popular’. Plastically fake.
I hate things in groups of four**.
There is no way that I would stop at just having four kitchen aids.
So FIVE it is.

I just can’t decide on the last colour. Not so surprisingly this might also the colour palette of my future house.

Jed’s father gave me a new phone. It’s more like Jed’s father gave JED a new phone and Jed told him to give it to me.
You see before that I have had the same phone for 5 years straight.
This is unheard of for a teenage girl.
I like decorating things.

*I take no responsibility for what will happen to you if you say this as a pick up line nor do I take responsibility how accurate it is.
**This applies to everything. If I have two child then get pregnant with twins? You can bet your pretty pixel arse I will have another one.

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Political spewl from a pancake ruiner screaming jellyfish.

I might have accidentally lost my journal.
I am very good at losing things.
If I had superpowers it would be one of mine.
It’s not so much as lost more like infinitely misplaced.
I inherited it from my mother.
She is infamous in our house for putting her car keys in the fridge.
JED is even better at losing things than I am.
He is constantly asking me where things are.
“Where is the remote?”
“Behind you.”
“Where is your drink bottle?”
“Behind you.”
“Where are the house keys?”
“On the drink bottle. Which is behind you.”
“Where is my eftpos card?”
“In your pocket. On your jeans. Behind you.”
And so it goes on.

Currently he has gotten me to make pancakes for him.
He’s been bugging me at midnight for the last two nights to make him some then and there.
He hates eating breakfast in the morning.
So guess what I am doing?
Making him pancakes IN THE MORNING.

Usually the first pancake I make is the only dud.
I screwed up three.
I was way too busy prancing around the house screaming at the top of lungs about the grades I got for the first two assignments.
4/4 and 9/10.
A+ BABY!!
We are studiously ignoring the fact that the next assignment after that I got 17/40.
It was all about lewis diagrams-y things which for the life of my I still don’t get.
5 years later from when I first learnt it.
It’s taken a long time to exist within MELNATION.

Did I mention that it takes me over an hour to make a batch of pancakes?
I’m a perfectionist.
Perfect pancakes are a bitch.
I hate the brown burnt butter in the pan.
All of my pancakes are cooked on low heat and flipped to perfection.
Secret is butterbutterbutter.
Even my pancake recipe calls for butter.

We get free newspapers at my university.
It’s quite nice.
Also dangerous.
It gives me more reasons to dislike our prime minster.

Do you see what I mean? He just sits there smiling.
ALL OF THE TIME.
Granted he is a multi millionaire.
50 million dollars millionaire.

He wants to screw around with my student loan.
THAT IS NOT OKAY.

I am a part-time student. At the moment this is all I can do whilst trying to mentally gain stability.

How is reducing the amount of students getting tertiary            education going to help in the recession?
Making it hard to get financial support is not the answer.
In particular when he says things like  this –
“That is about the only thing that will get [young people] out of bed before seven o’clock at night to vote, but it’s not politically sustainable to put interest back on student loans.”

I voted.
Before 7 o’clock I might add.
What I didn’t do was to vote for YOU John key.

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Pills, JED, doughnuts and books.

Jed is getting more and more annoyed that I am busy typing away at the laptop.
Also- Jed does not eat doughnuts.
Shocking I know.
But this is coming from the person that eats pickled onions whole and drinks the brine.
Oh sorry, Jed has just informed me that ‘he sips it to get the flavour thankyouverymuch!’

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All my head goes is JEDJEDJED.

It is sunday night.
Jed gets back on Tuesday afternoon.
Tuesday its self will be spent tramping out to the airport.
So that just leaves tomorrow.

I’ve been depressed. In bed for about a week straight. Not doing anything. I know that I should be trying but I can’t bring myself to motivate myself to.

So thinking post today it will be.
I wrote this after an incident with a less than kind neighbour.

 

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Coffee infused state.

I am a tea drinker.
I even have a tea song that I sing when I want a cup of tea.

(GUY IN GRIZZLY BEAR SUIT IS JED. HE GRIZZLES LOTS.)

I drink a lot of tea at home mostly because I love tea and partly because we don’t have a coffee machine at home. I don’t know how to make a latte.

A good cup of English Breakfast tea with trim milk- no sugars, will get you thank yous that echo around the universe.

This will also be how the aliens find the planet Earth.
They do not come in peace.
The only person shouting thankyou will be me.

I only drink coffee at cafes.
Trim latte with 1-3 sugars mood dependent.
I do not have it often.
Even if the thought of cafes will me up with glee.
They have cake.
I would marry cake.


I had a coffee today.
I can not sleep.
I usually fall asleep quickly, easily and deeply.
Case and point- I was helping a good friend move and I fell asleep on her matress for an hour.
3 people were trying to wake me up in that hour. All at once.


So what does my coffee infused brain decide to do?
Write a blog post about a coffee induced sleepless state.

xo Mel who is painting a table.

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Cereal People.

I am not a cereal person.
I do not like cereal.

The only times I will eat cereal is if it is with Yoghurt.
The last time I ate Cereal-Yoghurt I threw up in Jed’s father’s car.
Nothing quite makes a lasting impression than throwing up in your boyfriend’s father’s expensive car!
For the record, I am a neat vomiter. It doesn’t splatter and I usually have a plastic bag ready to catch.

I have beef with cereal. Beef.

People who don’t instantly gravitate towards anything chocolate would choose a ‘healthy’ alternative.
I have beef with that too.

Bread is best.

Before you ask, yes Jed eats cereal.
He will eat the whole box of nutrigrain and a whole 2 litres of milk when he feels like it.
I smother my bread in basil pesto just in case he’s still peckish.
He hates the smell and I turkeygulp it down.

I would like cereal a whole lot more if it came with chilli.

-MEL.

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Once upon a time-

Once upon a time there was a man called Jed.
Jed had recently moved to a new university.
He knew a few people there but not a lot.
As it turns out, out of all of the students that studied at that university, Mel and Jed’s friend circle crossed.
The first time he saw this Jellyfish princess she had her eyes shut to the world.
His heart ached and he yearned to see a smile grace her features.
They spent many long nights at the library chatting away.
When they weren’t talking in person, they were talking over the internet, over the phone, always always talking.
All around them their friends asked if they were dating, how great a couple they would be.
Mel laughed it off, she didn’t know that she was in love with Jed.
She insisted that he was like a big brother to her.
Jed had a better idea of his feelings.

It occurred one evening when Mel realised that she never wanted Jed to leave her side.
How right this was, her dancing the night away in his arms.
Him holding her close.
She told him that she is in love with him and he said that he is with her.

From that time on HE WAS/IS STUCK WITH HER.
Stuck with a girl who loves to meow!

Mel might be the ‘insane’ one but she questions Jed’s sanity for being willing to spend time with her.

-MEL.

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